Cat's Out of The Bag :Benjamin:

[Donovan Riddle]

Donovan paced through the his private study, he pretty pissed off at this point, how could someone he trusted enough to invite him back into the inner circle, be so reckless? With everyone finding out about him letting a werewolf into the inner circle, it looked badly on him. On top of that, that same werewolf killed another member of his inner circle. He took his hand and swung it hard against the wall, every time he thought he made a good move, people were coming back to prove that no, he didn't. 

Already have owling Burke to meet him in the study on the third floor, he didn't even attempt to try and calm himself. He wondered if Burke would show up after the secret was let out, he hoped so, because otherwise he'd have to go looking for him. Donovan wasn't against it, especially after an incident like this one. Only issue was, while Donovan had dueled, while he had been trained in a lot of things, tracking was not something he had a lot of opportunity to learn. Deciding that if Burke didn't show, he'd summon Syl and have her come with him to find him.

Looking out the window of the study, he wondered if maybe his father's methods weren't completely wrong.  Donovan was normally against the way his father ran things, because there was a long list of double-crossers , but he was at least feared. The only one Donovan was sure was completely loyal to him was Sylvanna, but Donovan had also been sure of Burke and Swyvett, but now one was dead and the other the killer. 

[Deleted]

How had it all come to this? Where did he make the mistake which lead to this hell on earth? Reality seemed worse than everything he had feared the past few months. How could he be so dumb to believe everything would finally be okay? Life never had given him lemons before he'd only been thrown rocks at him. Despite all the hard work and sleepless nights he sacrificed to make sure nothing would go wrong somehow the impossible happened. Facing the truth hadn't been this hard before. Ever since the conversation with Potter things went downhill. After the school year was done Benjamin had ran into his ex wife again who now knew that he was teaching at Hogwarts. He'd never seen her that furious. However she was right. Someone like him shouldn't be allowed to walk free among innocent children. One small mistake and he could end up slaughtering the same people he was supposed to give a brighter future by teaching them. After the summer he probably won't return. Everybody knew and he had no idea who had turned on him. He trusted too many people, that was his mistake.

And the mistake had happened. How he didn't know, but it had been true even when he didn't want to believe it. It had been a day of horror as he woke up like he had never before. That day the last pride the last human piece of him was shattered, gone. Instead he felt pure self loathing and guilt for he had woken surrounded by the bloody corpses of his best friend Davion and his young boy Dave. That image would never leave his retina, it was carved inside of his conscience. To even think that he was the one who ended their lives, the feeling was indescribable. It was for sure that the two had tried to fight for their lives Ben only regretted that they didn't manage to kill him and get out alive. They had just been talking the day before, they had celebrated the start of the summer with Dave. And of course even when he was what he was for years his potion worked flawlessly and nobody ever would have thought it'd come to this.

The past few days Benjamin had been hiding, from the ministry who'd sure have found the bodies by now as well for everyone he knew. Embarrassed with who he was and what he had done, he lived from day to day just wondering what it all was worth for. Things will never return the way they were. He had eaten just a little these days feeling sick every time he chewed on something. Even the simplest thing as drinking water had been hard. He'd probably looked like a mess now, he'd lost a lot of weight and his hair had gained some grey hairs. His robes were ragged and looked dirty. It was a way he hadn't looked like since returning from Azkaban. Somehow an owl managed to reach him, which made him fear that the ministry found him. However it turned out to be the young lord. Oh how much he must be disappointed right now. Reading it, Benjamin sighed to himself and didn't suspect much good coming from it. In the end he decided to go, just out of respect and good manners. Because that was who he once was before falling into this chaos.

Arriving at the mansion, he noticed that there weren't much people around. Some of the members seemed to have changed their minds after all. The only few people who were there shot him a judging look as he walked past them and then turned their head pretending like he didn't exist for them. It had been the same thing like he once judged werewolves, so Benjamin couldn't blame him. Especially now he knew everything bad about them was true, for he had committed the precise act he hated them for. He'd been a mindless beast and innocent blood was shed because of it.

At the door of the study room, he bit his bottom lip before he knocked three times. First he wanted to say something but there was a block stuck in his dry throat.

[Donovan Riddle]

Turning to the knock on the door, Donovan waved his hand to tell Burke to come in, he didn't want to start screaming as soon as the older man walked in, and everything in Donovan was rough, angry energy. He was trying to build something from nothing and the nothing he had was becoming even more of nothing! Turning to Burke, his eyes tracing over the man, it showed that this incident had hit him hard as well. The ragged clothes made Donovan wonder where Burke had been hiding before he came here, if he was anywhere he could have showered or at least cleaned himself. The looks of the man was not the man that Donovan had been used to seeing.

Not wanting to stall the situation any longer, he moved his hand to where the seating was silently telling Burke he could take a seat. Donovan wasn't really in the mood of being a good host for what the situation was. Anger was in voice has he spoke, "What the bloody hell were you thinking?" Donovan wanted to pity this man, he believes that he would have had it not turned around and looked bad on him. Moments like these, made him want to take in fathers steps. He's killed before. He know very well how to horcruxes. Donovan didn't want to loose himself along the way, he didn't want to be looked as insane, but the way things were going right now, he was sure he'd be driven insane anyway.

"Do not tell me it was a bloody accident either! You damn well know when it's a full moon, you know when it's coming." While he didn't know much about werewolves to study them, he knew the basics, he knew that it wore down on the human the closer the full moon was. This was not going to go over well, in the least of the followers he has kept, Donovan knew this was going to over badly. What type of scam was he running? Keeping werewolves around! One in his inner circle at that! "I trusted you. I welcomed you back to the circle when my father died. I went against your Lord's wished because I thought you could do this, blood hell..."

Looking back to the window, Donovan stretched out his fingers turning them into fists, unaware of what he wanted to do with his hands. His body wanted to do nothing but move with everything inside of him screaming at him to strike, he glared at the Death Eater, "By looking at you, you at least know the seriousness of what you have done. My most loyal consists of one blood person, my father would have killed the lot of you. Perhaps that's what I should do, just kill the lot to prove a damn point. People leaving, people doing whatever the hell they want, killing each other." Donovan was more mumbling to himself at this point in his rant, he pulled out his wand gripping it tightly, moving in case Burke decided to pull out his own wand. Donovan didn't need it, but he knew it helped to remind the other person that Donovan was already ready.

"What use do I have for you at this point?" Donovan moved back to meet the elder man's eyes, he respected this man and admired his talent with magic, but it meant very little if he couldn't trust the man to control himself. "From where I stand this was no accident, you are more than aware of when the full moon comes." It was was said was certainty and narrow eyes.

[Deleted]

The door opened and Benjamin froze for a second before proceeding in. As he walked in he leaped a bit with his left leg probably due to the fight his best friend put up before it had been his end. Of course there had been no chance to go to St. Mungos because every public place was controlled by the ministry and he would be caught. It was the same reason why he couldn’t afford a place to stay or proper food, if he went to Gringotts the ministry probably would be waiting for him. Ben had no idea how to face the young lord after what happened. In the end he decided to keep quiet for the majority of the time and let the leader do the talking. Noticing the eyes of the younger male upon him, he knew that he was yet again about to be judged. However it wasn’t something he didn’t expect. What was going to happen here, he knew that it wouldn’t be what he wished but he also knew that things have sunken too far already for that.

When he was told to sit down, he moved to the spot the young lord was pointing at but stood still there. Why he did this was because he didn’t want to dirty the seat. For he felt disgusting, here and there he had cleaned up but it was nothing compared to his former personal hygiene. Once the lord spoke, Benjamin lifted his head and looked at him. He had to, it’d be rude and cowardly not to look at the lord when spoken upon. Still he felt a bitter taste in his mouth caused by the anger in the lord’s voice.

The lord continued and Benjamin’s jaw tightened. Of course he knew when the full moon was approaching he had tens of calendars and watched all over the place, making sure nothing would go wrong. He started with the wolfsbane potion on time each month again. That to add that he had done it for years now without failing. At the school, at Davion’s place and even a few times in the Riddle mansion. Every time things went smoothly except for this time. What went wrong he didn’t know. It’d be either that he screwed up the potion for some unknown reason or someone had been messing with it. The culprit could have been everyone. Upon hearing the lord speak again, Ben cleared his mind and listened to the painful words. It was true, the former dark lord had thrown him out of his inner circle ever when he became well what he had become. Perhaps the dark lord had been right and Benjamin had been too confident with his own skills. In the end no lie could cover up that he was a monster, a demon with a human face.

It was even before he was turned. How many innocent muggle families, blood traitors and muggleborns had he tormented and killed? How many people who betrayed the dark lord had he sent to Azkaban? How many ministry secrets had he stolen for his dark lord? Isa had been right about him all along. And now he finally lost control and had the blood of his best friend and his little boy on his hands. Even though he had killed so many this was different. Because this was the first time he wasn’t able to decide what his body would do. His mind had been replaced and it haunted him to see what he was capable of when out of control. He hurt those who were dear to him, his friend who stayed with him even when everyone abandoned him.

Noticing that the young man was now mumbling to himself, he decided not to comment on it. For he wasn’t the kind of person to be rude to his superiors. Even when he saw that the lord took his wand, he did nothing. There was no will inside of him to fight someone he didn’t want to fight. Deep down he wanted to be punished for what he’d done. For being a fool and think that nothing ever would go wrong. For being too blind to see how things went wrong.

What use was he? Benjamin didn’t know any more. Being like this, the pile of mess he was now, probably nothing more than a human shield or eh strike that human part. When the new lord was done talking he finally allowed himself to speak. “I thank you for all your kindness and trust you’ve given me, my lord.” He bowed to show the young man that he had appreciated all the lord has done for him. “I cannot describe the amount shame I feel right now. No words can make up for the mistake I made and thus I accept any kind of punishment.” His voice was husky and broken, nothing like how he usually sounded. With having nothing to drink for a long time his throat had gone completely dry.

[Donovan Riddle]

Donovan was angry, but he wasn't hurt, this wasn't a personal issue with him. He knew Davion enough, but not enough to have a lose to mourn. Looking over the older man the guilt was so obvious, he damned himself again for being so much like his mother and not his father, what did he care the man messed up? Donovan looked away, looking at the empty fireplace trying to find better words to say, but nothing came to mind that was truly what he wanted to say. While anger still there, there was pity too. Knowing the full moon was coming, Burke should have been prepared, should have taken some distance between him and the rest of everyone else. Why he didn't was beyond the young Lord. "Damn it.."

Donovan pocketed his wand, as he looked back to Burke, he let out a ragged annoyed breath through his nose, if his father was here, Burke would have been either killed or caged. Donovan couldn't do that. Narrowing his eyes, he finally found more words, "He was your friend wasn't he? You two, seemed...close." Donovan didn't have any close friends, he didn't have any friends really, so he didn't try to understand a friendship or bond outside of family if he saw one. It was confusing and it wasn't something Donovan ever had, he never let himself think about getting to that point either. So he thought of himself in Burke's shoes if he lost Draco, the pain and regret he would feel would be immense. One thing his father never had, was empathy. Donovan knew right away, that was his mother's doings.

"I will never be my father, no matter what I want, doesn't seem like it's happening." He said aloud, Donovan wished he had cared less about the people who are walking away, he wished he could look at the man in front of him and feel nothing but anger or disappointment, but he didn't. Looking over the older wizard, Donovan could see the weight loss, he could see the lack of sleep in his eyes, and if the voice hadn't spoken so roughly, Donovan could look at the man and assume he wasn't eating, let along drinking anything. Looking back towards the doorway, "I don't want you dead, as much as I don't trust you, I want you around. You've been helpful aside from your one major mistake. You are no longer apart of my rank.. You've been a teacher and what I thought was loyal up until your accident. Which still does not seem like one."

Walking for a second trying to release a little of his energy, "There are rooms here. Sleep, shower, eat. Tomorrow we'll talk about punishment when you don't look like you'll fall over dead with a stunning curse." Donovan didn't look at Burke when he spoke, feeling more embarrassed about his mercy than he was anything else. "You were pure before you were turned, you were just a wizard, one can't blame you for being turned, but I can blame you for putting yourself in a spot like you did. Don't leave headquarters unless you absolutely need to, last thing I want it the ministry following you back here."

[Deleted]

It surprised him that the young lord pocked his wand yet the annoyance of the younger male was clearly there, Ben could not blame him. Yet the following words were beyond what he predicted and he was caught off guard by them. His eyes betrayed how much he was hurt emotionally because of this as he set a step back and now looked at the ground. “Yes, he was... he was my best friend and I loved him like a brother.” He painfully brought out, still not accepting the truth. Forcefully he closed his eyes and tried to forget the image but he couldn’t. Dave had been like a nephew to him, he’d been proud of the young boy as he succeeded to get a good grade in potions. Now all the hard work just seemed to go to waste because he had been too reckless. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to feel anymore.

‘It’ll be all right. Tomorrow we’re having a drink, that’ll cheer you up.’ Davion had said to him on that one day where Ben came back from a mayor fight with his ex wife. She’d been yelling things in public which she was supposed to keep secret. And even when Davion never was the person who’d overly show his kindness, he was a good man. After Davion tried to comfort him Benjamin went to the cellar and closed the heavy door behind him for his monthly routine. While it was a fine defence from keeping people out while he was transforming under influence of a fully functional wolfsbane, this time it failed. The strength of the wolf apparently had been enough to break out. It terrified him that his small body could contain such force.

As young Mr. Riddle said that he would never be as his father, Ben shot him a sympathetic look “You shouldn’t try to copy your father, sir. He was a great man but you’re a great man yourself, just in a different way. You’re still Young, my lord, but I believe that you’ll find your way.” He said into nothing, almost if he was in some kind of trance. Because for a moment he closely resembled the man he once was, he was almost like a ghost. “And you don’t always get what you’re aiming for.” He reminded the young man as he was the perfect example of it.

The young lord continued and Benjamin was surprised that he wasn’t wanted dead. For a moment he had welcomed it but instead he was brought in this strange situation. He did not suspect his lord to trust him after this, heck he didn’t even trust himself anymore. “I wouldn’t suspect you to trust me, I am what I am after all and I guess that trust brought this chaos along.” He said, convinced that someone who knew what he was messed around with his wolfsbane. However it could be a lot of people. The ones who knew were Davion(who’d only be stupid if he messed around with it), Dave, Isa, Arabella, Beauclaire, the young Lord himself, Andrews and even Potter knew. But how could anyone of them have messed around and why?
The only thing which was bugging him was how convinced the young wizard was that this not an accident. “Please don’t tell me that you think that I planned this to happen. Until now I haven’t found out myself how it could ended up like this but I’ll find the cause.”

His mouth fell open in astonishment as he could not believe what he was hearing. Was the lord showing him mercy? Even offering him things?! “My lord, I can’t accept this. You’re too kind to someone like me.” He exclaimed with a confused look on his face. Then he reconsidered and said: "Fine. 'll do as you wish, sir. The way I am now is disgraceful and I am sorry that you have to be in my presence. I'll clean myself up and stay hidden in the cellar until you call for me. So nobody has to know that you've done this." Of course it would be saver for every death eater as well if he stayed here. May the ministry find him they might go through his memories and find out everything. He either had to learn how to block it or stay put down like a pet dog. Benjamin himself didn't care much about what would happen to himself anymore. Though he could die yet before he was sure that his beloved daughter would for ever be save and happy. More than that he had nothing to live for. There was nothing left of the proud elite pureblood man he once was.

[Donovan Riddle]

Pursing his lips together, he just looked off to the side of the room, he didn't know what to say really. Did he really think that Burke wanted to kill his friend? No, but looking at all the things that lead to the incident didn't make him anymore comfortable to let Burke just go after everything. "I think if you gave a single thought about what you could have done, you'd have gone somewhere where there weren't people, or in the least not the people you know you want alive." He clicked it tongue, rubbing his eyes, he wondered if his father had been decided to go down the darker path because of incidents like this, or if it was just what he planned all along.

"From now on, closer to the date, I want you somewhere no one can find you. Find a forest, go to the outside Hogwarts, it's summer break right now, so you don't have to worry about harming anyone else." Donovan sat down on the corner of his desk, this meeting wasn't much more than lecture, but he wanted to make it as if the accident had never happened. His mother would be so proud, somehow that did little to comfort the young Lord. Donovan wanted to be the wizard his father would honor, even if he would never say it, Donovan knew very well when the Dark Lord was not pleased with him. "You are not only welcome here, but I wouldn't recommend leaving. I may not work with my father's methods, but I'm well aware of how they work, if you leave and the ministry find this place, I won't be the only wanting a piece of you." It wasn't a threat, it was a fact, it was a warning. He didn't want it to come to that, but he didn't want the ministry finding them either.

Donovan trusted that the man was good in human form, he trusted that he would do what he could to the best of his ability so long as the full moon wasn't close by, he didn't trust that he would be able to do it in the current emotional state he was in. Donovan's main reason for kicking the man out of the inner circle was to save face, while Davion was a man he had chosen to trust as well, his death wasn't hitting it for him. "You will be held in the same rank as Andrews, I see little else I can do with you." The rank Andrews was in was only one below the inner circle, but Andrews wasn't really looked in high regard.

Raising his eyebrows when Burke told him he couldn't accept it, that did little to help Donovan's anger. It only fueled it more, he was already upset with himself for letting this go, but when it was acknowledged like that, it made him want to take it back. Knowing it was childish to think like that, he wanted to prove a point, but that was a bad way of doing it. "If you choose to stay in the cellar, that is on you. I'm not putting you there, but I don't care where you choose to sleep, but in the state you are in, you're of very small use to me. You'll be joining Andrews in his work, but I can't send you like this, you'll only cause me more issues and get yourself caught."

"You have one week, heal. If you don't, I will still be sending you out with Andrews, if you get caught...I won't be helping you. You were once a pureblood, act like it. Look like it. You can mourn the loose of your friend of your brother, but don't let it effect your work and your life."

[Deleted]

Benjamin was scolded again for his mistakes and let his head hang. When the young lord said it like that it all seemed to simple. He stared at the floor with hollow eyes and mumbled desperately to himself. “It’s so frustrating... Ever since I was bitten, I prepared the wolfsbane potion every time. That kept others save from me, and it worked, for two years. I stayed in my office at Hogwarts, I trusted my own skills enough to do that.” Yes trusted because he lost it all now. Heck Potions was along with Ancient Runes and Charms the things he was extremely talented in. Failing, losing control and hurting innocent people, it had been his biggest fear and it had become reality. “My apologies, I can’t talk away my mistake. I should have known better. I’m sorry for bringing it up.” He said and looked up again. How foolish that he believed that he was better than the other werewolves. Benjamin always thought those were just stupid wildlings, not even wanting to take the effort to stay save. However now he had become a wildling himself. Besides there was only a limited amount of wizards and witches who could actually brew wolfsbane. It is one of the most complicated potions and the slightest mistake could reduce the quality.

As the young lord told him to hide from humans from now on, he nodded. “I will, sir. It’ll be the last place the ministry comes looking for me. I’ll take polyjuice potion and an extra file of it along so I won’t get caught on my way.” He suggested and looked at the younger man to await his reaction to this idea. If the ministry found him he won’t only get executed for not being registered as werewolf and killing two people. No, they knew that he was a former Death Eater so they’ll use legilimency to gain information. “And what about when Hogwarts starts again? I’m not going to be there when students can enter the forest. Even when it is forbidden for students to enter, They do it anyways.” Not much emotion was detected from his face while a worried look was clear in his eyes. There would be no way he’d make the same mistake again. Nodding again when he was told it’d be better to stay here hidden, he saw reason in this. “I don’t want to cause you more trouble than I’ve already done, my lord.”

Upon hearing that he would not get completely disowned his haw dropped. It was beyond what he expected. “Sir, do you still want me to fight for you?” His tired and broken voice betrayed the astonishment. At first he wasn’t sure how to put this but deep down he was grateful. He bowed and look up again. “I won’t disappoint you again, sir.” Yes he knew that he’d be put into the same rank with the one person he hated the most. However even when this was a challenge for his patience, he took it along. There still was a chance he could fight for a better world. Even when he’d be forced to work with Andrews. A few weeks ago he’d be savaged to be brought into the same day light as that man but now he didn’t care anymore. For they had become the same thing now anyways. Benjamin was no longer superior, well yeah perhaps in magic but as a person they were both as bad but in a different way.

As the young lord spoke once again and told him what he could expect, Benjamin nodded once more. “I understand, my lord.” He said. Yes he’ll work on it, he already brought enough shame to the Burke name which was once a pureblood name of glory. And now here he was a cowardly beast, he could not give up yet. This shouldn’t bring him down. But before he could do anything, he’d need to rest.

[Donovan Riddle]

It wasn't any trouble, but it wasn't something he want to encourage, giving the older man a place to hide was the least of his issues at the moment. "You'll be working with Andrews purely because he's a wolf, you'll be held in a higher ranking than he is. It's obvious your of more use than he is, so I won't take credit from you, speaking of use, you know speechless magic right?" Looking over the man, Donovan didn't know how to create spells without speaking, he didn't understand how to master that, but he did understand how to work with wandless magic. That was pure emotion, with speechless magic, that was all work in the mind, and Donovan didn't understand how to master that.

Giving a nod, his anger was dying away the longer they spoke, he was more upset about the situation than at Burke himself. "Your wolf, it has a mind of it's own correct?" Donovan didn't even wait for Burke to answer when he continued with his questioning, "So if you're in a wolf form how can you guarantee that you won't be traced back here after you've been in your form?" He didn't want the ministry stiffing around here, not only did these people still bare he dark mark, but Donovan was unknown still to the entire wizard world. Him being found by the ministry would risk his family as well.

"Since you are no longer at the school and you spend most of your time here, I see no reason you can't up those training lessons you had previously. With the trainees, as for Andrews, it's up to the two of you if you want to continue that." The meeting that was originally supposed to just be a scolding, turned into an actual meeting to get his stuff going once again. "I'll send Andrews and Syl to see if they can collect the bodies, we can give them a more honorable goodbye than anyone of the ministry will allow. If you let this happen again, you will be turned in." Donovan would rather be killed than caged, and he'd rather be housed her hidden then publicly captured, he only assumed that Burke's pride matched his. Davion was just much a pureblood as anyone else, his death wasn't a fault. Let alone the boy who died with him.

"You can go, but remember incidents like this is why we're fighting for purebloods only. Don't let it happen again." Donovan stated his point, but he was going to let Burke leave before he falls on the floor, lack of sleep and food did wondered to a person.

[Deleted]

Even when working with Andrews sounded like hell on earth, he didn’t go against his lord’s wishes. He had gotten another chance to prove himself and he was professional enough to not let his hate towards Andrews get in the way. When he was asked about his speechless magic, Benjamin blinked. It was a little random but logical for the young lord to ask. “Yes I indeed am supposed to master speechless magic. However it takes a calm mind and a lot of control. I doubt that I’m able to do so at the moment. It’ll come back once I have gotten over all this.” He said with somewhat of seriousness in his voice but things will get better, right? Perhaps he over reacted a little bit to this. In the past he had also killed the woman he loved most and he managed to get over that as well. Even when this was a different situation. Besides it was not like he tried yet if he still was capable of speechless magic but it seemed logical to him that with his mind distorted like this it won’t be flawless.

To the rhetorical question of his lord, Ben simply nodded. It seemed that the younger man didn’t really need the answer either for he continued. When he was asked again a question, he scratched his chin before answering. “I could take a small bottle of polyjuice potion with me for afterwards. Or,” He stopped and doubted if this was a smart idea. “Or I could do it here. I mean not in this house but the woods surrounding it. That way I can’t be tracked down at all. No humans other than Death Eaters know of this place.” With ‘it’ he meant the transformation of course. Benjamin always avoided speaking words anything related to werewolves. Nobody knew why but he seemed to still to have trouble saying the words. The young lord would make the final decision in the end and Benjamin would just go with it. As long as he was save for others. It would be either in the woods or a enchanted cell where he possibly couldn’t get out. For he didn’t want to rely on wolfsbane alone anymore.

“I’ll continue training the newer members but I wonder if they are willing to be taught now that they know what I am. People’s opinion change you know. I won’t even know what I’d do if I saw uncle Fawley again. He must be so disappointed if he knew.” Benjamin didn’t know what caused Caspar to leave but he did know that his uncle wasn’t too pleased with Donovan so it wouldn’t be that strange after all. “I’ll see how things go but I’m open for it.” He ensured his lord.

His face went even paler when the young lord said that Andrews and Beauclaire would be sent to clean up his mess. Looking at the ground he didn’t know what to say and just let it pass. However as Donovan continued, he looked up again. “May I ever make the same mistake, I’d rather have either you or Beauclaire to finish me. You’ll never know what the ministry can do once they have free play with my mind.” It’d be for the best for everyone. He was very certain of this decision.

Once he was dismissed, he bowed and nodded. “Thank you, sir.” He said and struggled with his way to the exit. The sudden movement caused black spots in his vision and his balance was tested. And it was not like his hurt leg was helping much, however he managed to reach the door without collapsing. He’d take a shower first for sure, out of everything Benjamin valued good hygiene the most. Then he’d see if he had energy left to eat something or just turn to sleep in his brown leather chair that still was in his small lap in the dungeons.