Honey, I'm Home :Gabe:

[James Dillion Halsey]

When Gabe came out, James looked up at him, and just waiting up on him to come over, he followed the other man more with his eyes than his head. Smiled a little when Gabe did, he nodded, he wasn't really cold, but the blanket was soft and it was more comfy to curl up like this. Crawling over the couch to his boyfriend, James leaned on his shoulder pulling the blanket with him. Ignoring the comment about his interests in the TV, he just jumped to it looking up at Gave, "I'm sorry I pushed you..That was pretty stupid to do. I was just trying to play around a little, but it was kinda childish to do and I knew that.. I'm sorry though, I..I don't know."

Feeling more guilty about upsetting Gabe than actually getting him wet, because he thought Gabe would retaliate! Really, he just wanted to have a little fun, but it wasn't fun if he was the only one. He pushed he remote up to Gabe, giving up on finding anything, because he was just picky about everything. Even if James didn't admit it, he normally gave up with it in the end and made Gabe choose or he'd just turn it off. "You find a movie."

The popcorn was sitting in the spot James had left in order to sit next to Gabe, "I love you." James wasn't insecure really, but he just cared a lot about Gabe. Not having anyone other than Hunter growing up, James held on tightly with Gabe. So it was rare that James actually got mad enough to do more than sulk, and when James felt that Gabe got mad, James just wanted to cave to make things better.

[Gabriel Roman Sykse]

Allowing James to crawl over to him, Gabe wrapped his arms over the younger male, almost as if he were protecting him from the outside world. Gabe's eyes wandered to the TV for a moment. "Don't apologize. You were just having a bit of fun. I'm just tired and it's been a long day is all." He gaze a half shrug and yawned as he lazily took the remote and flipped through the channels. "I love you too."

Love. Gabe said it more often than not to James and only James. Everyone else didn't mean anything. James was the only person that Gabe cared for. The only person he loved and wanted to protect. The younger male meant the world to him and he'd give up everything to keep James happy. No one had ever made Gabe feel like this. If James wasn't a Death Eater then maybe he'd have taken their relationship a bit farther, but he wasn't sure if James wanted that. Two years was a long time and what not, but did it really matter to James. Gabe knew he wasn't James' plaything, but he often wondered if things would ever move forward with them. Then again, he was content with his living together and having each other.

"How about 300? It's pretty good, I think you'll like it." He dropped the remote and glanced at the popcorn. I wonder if I can make him get it for me....

[James Dillion Halsey]

Nodding, James still wish he hadn't done it now. Regardless of the point of his actions at the time, he didn't get the reaction he wanted. He just shrugged, even though it wasn't really a big deal, James still didn't like the reaction. "Yeah, and you got home late. I should have known to just let you relax." He kissed Gabe's cheek from his position, leaning his head on his boyfriend, looking at the TV, he didn't really care about what they watched anymore, he was just relaxed enough to just cuddle. As long as it wasn't about cowboys. James did not understand the point of Western movies, so he just refused to watch them.

"Hey, so I've been..you know, thinking about us. And about us more making this more official..What do you think?" James tried to keep his voice casual, but the next step for the two after moving in together and dating, it's a big step. They had already been together two years, wasn't that long enough? Or was it supposed to be more? James wanted to, but he didn't know about Gabe. It was awkwardly worded, and James even knew that, but he didn't know how to say it other than a blunt 'let's get married'.

"Yeah, okay. I saw parts of it before, all the guys have muscles." James snickered a little, trying to be funny after his very serious statement.

[Gabriel Roman Sykse]

Gabe laughed. "Oh please, you're too excited to leave me alone whenever I get home late. You really should come visit me and the band sometime. Or maybe I should learn to set my music aside for you. Music is important to me, but you're more important than music," he said. Even to him that sounded like a lie. Music was his life and although James was important, could he really fill Gabe's love of music. He decided not to think about it. The young man smiled and then leaned forward to kiss James on the lips. A kiss on the cheek wasn't enough for him.

Gabe's easiness faded lightly when James spoke. Was his boyfriend a mind reader? "More official," he repeated slowly. He was almost glad for the sudden change of tone when his boyfriend brought up the movie. Gabe smiled, but he knew he'd have to address the situation on this moving forward thing. "If that's what you want," he said with a small smile.  Gabe would never admit aloud, because he didn't think James would believe him, considering that he was into his music and band, and spent way too much time drinking and partying, but he wanted a family. He wanted something to call his own, but with James being a Death Eater, he didn't want to start anything that could disappear at a moments notice if things went wrong.

[James Dillion Halsey]

Shoving his boyfriend on the side, "Hey! I said relax, meaning I should have gotten in the shower with you instead of pushing you in it. I'm like apologizing and you're making fun of me." James stuck out his tongue, and leaned moved to get on his knees on the couch, careful not to kick the popcorn on the other side, taking his leg and swinging it over Gabe, sitting on his lap facing him. "I want to. Do you want to?"

Not thinking about his life out of their relationship would be a factor in Gabe's decision. James didn't see anything wrong with what he was doing, sure it was risky some times, but he needed to this for himself. It was something he felt he had to do, he never thought about if they took the final step what would happen if he got hurt or killed doing what he did would be any different than if he wasn't a Death Eater. "You know I want to, look at me, seriously. A wedding? That would be...be like, like.. an orgasm for me without sex."

"You know, somehow you saying I'm more important than your music..that is like...I'd rather hear that on a daily basis that I love you. That's deep." James grinned with a laugh, running a hand through Gabe's damp hair, he wrinkled his nose when his finger became wet. "You know...dying charms work wonders." The cockiness in the tone was obvious, there were reasons, James was called a Diva, even if James drew his wand on anyone who said it to his face.

[Gabriel Roman Sykse]

Gabe was starting to feel uncomfortable about this. He could see the younger male wanted this, and pretty badly too from the way he spoke. Gabe would do anything for James, but this, this was not something her wanted to do for his boyfriend of two years. He turned his gaze away from James, pretending to watch the movie. If he sad no, James would probably hate him. If he said yes, Gabe would want things to change. The last thing he wanted to do was to get married, start a family, then come home with to find out that James had been killed. Just the thought of it made him sick. It was bad enough that he'd come home during the war to find James in pretty bad shape.

Gabe didn't know why, but the memory struck a cord that made him want to cry. James had been burned and Crucio'd and he hadn't wanted to talk. Gabe had been at a loss and he'd been scared he'd lose the one thing that was precious to him. He knew he'd been silent for too long, but he didn't want to look at James right now, because he'd have a break down. The extra weight on his body forced him to look at his boyfriend and force a smile onto his face. "James, you know you mean the world to me, right? And you know that I'd do anything for you, even propose if that's what you want. I'd give you the biggest wedding your heart desires," he began. His gaze looked off to the side again. "But I can't right now. I...." Would he rather have James angry at him, or feeling guilty about being a Death Eater. "It's just, I'm about to go on tour with the guys and there won't be much time. We're getting pretty big and I really want this," he lied.

When James started messing with his hair he shrugged. "I think I can live with my hair not being completely dry," he told his boyfriend with a small smile. "Um, I know how bad you want this, but can it wait a little while longer," he asked. He wanted things to calm down before he proposed. "You know I love you though, right?" His voice caught in his throat because he felt like he was tearing apart James dreams, but what else could he say or do?

[James Dillion Halsey]

Biting his bottom lip, James just nodded, he knew that Gabe loved him, he really did. But hearing that just sounded bad, the way the words came out, it just left an underlining 'but' to the sentence. Trying to force some excitement in his voice despite the awful feeling in his stomach, "I didn't know you were going on tour! That's amazing, why wouldn't you tell me that?!" He smiled, even though he didn't feel it at all, he got off Gabe before the water works started, "We should like...I don't know, celebrate right? I mean that is pretty big for you guys." James felt guilty for not being excited about hearing this, but it was kinda hard, when your boyfriend tells you his job is more important.

Moving to the kitchen to get something alcoholic, because that's a celebration right? Blinking when he felt his eyes starting to sting, he knew he should have left this to Gabe to bring up. He had waited though, and it was just moving slowly, so James said something, and well, not James was standing in the kitchen looking for god knows what to try and not make this night awful. He knew going on tour was big for Gabe, so he wasn't going to ruin that for him! James would be just as supportive as Gabe is about what he does, because..because he loves Gabe. Despite not getting married, James loved what he had. ..but you're more important than music.

Wiping his eyes, he blinks a few more times, before he coming back into the room with a bottle of fire whiskey and two glasses. He smiled as he sat them down, but sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table instead of the couch, he smiled pouring a class, "I'll be at every show, so you better be make sure to get a date list ASAP, understand?"

[Gabriel Roman Sykse]

Regret. That's what he felt. He should have simply told James that he was too tired to discuss such serious things. When he saw the look on James' face, Gabe closed his eyes, leaving them shut as he felt the weight removed from his body and the footsteps that moved towards the kitchen. "I didn't say anything because I'd already been spending way too much time away from home. I want to be here with you and a tour would mean traveling and I'm not sure I want to do this. I want to be near you all the time and it's just so damn hard to balance anything with everything that's going on right now."

He sighed and glanced at James over the couch before he turned over and curled up so he could hide the fact that he too was starting to feel the need to cry. His eye were watering and he couldn't stop the tears from spilling over. Gabe felt his chest tighten as he tried to hold it all back. When James came back and sat on the floor, Gabe moved without thinking. He wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. "Merlin James, I'm so sorry," he said as he buried his face into his boyfriend's neck. "I'm so sorry for being selfish. I just can't take the thought of becoming so much more than boyfriends and then losing you," he said. His voice a bit muffled. "I don't know what I'd do without you. I know you're capable of handling yourself, but it's...it's so hard. It's just so damn hard to imagine losing you. I want to be your everything and your nothing, I really do. I want to be able to call you mine, but not like this." He held James tight, almost as if the younger male would disappear.

"I don't want to hurt again. Not like that night you came home. It'll hurt so much more if we're more than this and I know that's selfish and you can hate me all you want, but please, please just know that I love you. I have always loved you and I will always love you and a wedding or marriage or a ring shouldn't define my love for you." Gabe usually had it together, but not now. He couldn't hold it together right now. He took in a deep breath, the pain in his chest fading and the tears that had briefly spilled were gone. He sat up as if realizing he'd just expose his deepest fears to James, which he had. He looked off to the side and rested against the arm of the chair. Part of him wanted to say, 'Pretend you didn't hear a word I said,' but the other part decided it was best to remain silent, so he did.

[James Dillion Halsey]

Surprised by the turn of events, James just moved his arms around Gabe, trying to sooth him. Trying to understand what was just happen, he rubbed Gabe's back, pushing himself off the floor to sit with his boyfriend, and comfort him better. "Hey, hey, I love you too. It's not selfish, it's really not..No, it's..I know." The accident was hard on James, he didn't think about it, he had been in bed for days healing plus a week to get his body functioning normally after the curse. James wanted to pretend it never happen, because hurt a lot more than just his pride when Gabe was the one to take care of him. Feeling guilty for Gabe having to do it, and seeing his boyfriend's face every day while James was going through it...it was hard for James to deal. "Wedding or not, I love you too. And you know what? I really don't need a wedding, you being here this long despite everything, it's enough."

Running his hands into Gabes hair, and movies his arms tightly around his boyfriend, James really just wanted a day to really dedicate to each other. It was just a day though, it was just a piece of paper, but thinking about it now, it really was safer for them. "I don't want to wait, but I can't stop what I do. I can't. Baby, please, don't cry, I didn't know it meant this much to you. I'm sorry. I love you so much, but you already are my everything. Getting married...it's really important to me, but I can't stop doing what I do Gabe, I...Please, if we did, would it make an a difference if I got hurt as your boyfriend than as your husband?"

Hugging his boyfriend tightly, he felt the wetness on his neck, his heart broke. "I want you in anyway I can have you, I couldn't do this, if you weren't here for me too." Pulling Gabe back to him roughly, he stared at him, "I don't hide from you, don't hide from me. I'm just as scared as you are, because I make sure I come home to you, I know I have to. Nothing will stop me from it."

[Gabriel Roman Sykse]

Gabe didn't say anything as James moved over to him. He could only look at the younger male and wonder if James would ever finally stop leaving on his missions. "You know I'm always here to support you," he said quietly. "No matter what side you're on." Gabe had never voiced his opinion on the war or James' status as a Death Eater. They'd both attended Hogwarts at some point, but what did that matter. It didn't. Nothing mattered except for James. Gabe would never dream of leaving, ever.

"It'd make a big difference. James, you're my family, my friend, my lover. You're everything to me and to lose you would be like losing a part of myself. It's not just what you do...I mean, it is, but I don't care. I honestly don't know how to explain it." He sighed, feeling a bit flustered with himself for not being able to just outright say this. Maybe he was afraid James would leave and the less caring side of him said, that if James left then the hell with him. He would be okay without him, but that wasn't true. "Getting engaged and then married is a step closer to having a legit family. I want...I want a full family. Not just me and you, I want kids. I want to see little Matthew's and Kristy's running around. Hell, I don't know." He sighed and looked up at the ceiling. "I want more just as bad as you do, but I'm not starting a family, just so it can get torn apart. I'm not going to start a family while you're a Death Eater so that one of your Death Eater friends can come over one night and tell me that you're dead. Then what? I can't do anything without you at my side."

Gabe looked at his boyfriend with a look that said 'When will it end', but the words would never be spoken aloud. Gabe didn't like putting his life on hold like this, but it was for the best. "I'm sorry for being this way right now. Generally I'd just shrug it off, but today I couldn't..." He shrugged. "I shouldn't be this selfish, especially not to you." He sighed and poured a glass of fire whiskey, taking the shot and the pouring two more after and downing those like they were simple glasses of water. When did I become so attached to him? All I've ever wanted was a family and no matter which way I look at it, I can't have one. My family gave me up, my adopted parents were nice, but they could never fill the void in my heart, and now I have a loving boyfriend and we can't have a family because I don't want our kids to be exposed to such danger. I don't want them to see James the way I saw him that night. I could barely take it, so how could they? "Just keep coming back to me in one piece," he finally said. "That way I can marry you."