Being a house cat .:open to Death Eaters:.

[Deleted]

It had been a few days now since his conversation with the young lord. To his surprise he was allowed to remain a Death Eater even  when he was downgraded a rank. The only thing was that he wasn't allowed to or rather could not leave the Riddle mansion. Out there were aurors looking for him and if they got him they'd also find out that the Death Eaters were still somewhat active. The past few days were spend mainly regaining physical and mental strength. Which mostly meant sleeping and meditating, eating still seemed a bit harder but he managed to get something in every day. Due to the fact that he didn't dare to face the others yet, he remained in his small lab brewing potions. Not very different from how he spend his time here before however the atmosphere somewhat changed.  The last thing he was waiting for was having to explain what happened all over again because that could cause a mayor relapse in his metal state.  

So basically he had become a house cat, only showing his face when he was called for or the house elves had prepared food for him. Of course there had to come a day where the trainings and missions would start again about which he was a little reluctant. There were positive sides and solo missions won't be a problem but the resent happening left a huge scar on his pride as well as his status among the other Death Eaters. Thing will be different and Benjamin couldn't handle changes all too well. He was a man with a plan, he used to have everything scheduled out. Fate has changed and he lost all the power on his own fate. 

The one thing he was still worried about was the upcoming full moon. No longer could he rely on his brewing qualities and this would be the second change without the influence of wolfsbane. It frightened him because the last time the potion failed, he slaughtered his best friend and his best friend's son. It were all things left to be sorted out but the clock was ticking. 

At the moment he was in the middle of a meditation process trying to get full control of his speechless magic again. Down in the dungeons where everyone knew that he was  there. They had left him alone the past days but of course it had to happen sooner or later that someone came to check by.

[Alex Dean Andrews]

Alex came into the Riddle home, looking for one man, he had told Casey and Maria that he needed to speak with Ben before they attacked. It was something he hoped he could get through to Ben, because of the things that had happen, Alex hoped that maybe this was the push he could get from him in order to bring Ben over to his side, to embrace the wolf part of him so that things like this didn't happen. Walking down to the dungeons, being the main place the older man spent his time, he went looking there first.

Listening for any sign of life down here in the basement, he wondered why Ben even stayed here. Everyone knew what he was, he was embarrassed of the accident, so instead of leaving, he hid, in what Alex viewed as a teenager's basement. Not knowing how Ben was feeling, but he did know what he was like to be scared for family. He knew the older man had a daughter, Alex had a daughter too, he would do anything to make sure he wasn't around her when it was full moon. Even though Chelsey was his kin, and he wanted to change her when it came time, her small body would not be able to handle it right now. "Burke, you down here?" Alex called out, as he took the final step on to the cement floor.

Finding the older man mediating, well, Alex couldn't help but look amused. Opening his mouth, he closed it again, holding back his teasing that were bubbling to come out. Leaning against the wall, he nodded as if he was saying he was okay with this, "I want to talk to you, if you got the time. It's pretty important." Donovan already knew Alex was a wolf, he already knew that Alex was the one who turned Benjamin, so Alex never once tried to hide being a werewolf, not like the man in front of him, Alex wanted to help but he always needed Ben to help him too.

"I heard about the accident, I think the entire world has heard by now..I'm sorry that you lost your friend." Sincerely, Alex did feel sorry for the man and his loose. It was hard to loose friends, it was even harder to loose family. It was obvious that Ben and Davion were good friends, by the way they acted around each other, so Alex did try to understand. His closest friend was his brother, and that was blood. "I can't undo what happen, but I can help you to make sure it doesn't happen again. If you're willing to accept my help at least." Alex spoke simply, he was going to try to get Ben to join him, but he knew sounding desperate was not the way to go about it.

[Deleted]

His concentration was disturbed when a very unpleasant voice could be heard in the dungeons. For a moment he dared to hope that it'd go away however he knew that it was unlikely to happen. Benjamin sighed and opened his eyes when the voice came closer. Like he expected, Andrews stood there, leaning against the wall. As the younger man told him he wanted to speak with him, Ben shot him a glare and raised an eyebrow. "Well I was in the middle of an important session of clearing my mind. I can't permit touching my wand before that."  That was the down side of a fully mastered speechless magic. There wasn't even need for thinking of a spell, it worked on emotions and thoughts. Things could be really dangerous if the user had a wand and got angry. Then again his wand type only made it harder. Luckily he always had been good in gaining control of his emotions.

"And why would I want to talk to you? In case you haven't noticed, I don't like you and I don't want to deal without outside of missions." Due to the meditating session he was calm but there was a huge shade of sass in his voice. His other eyebrow raised up as well. 'Something important' ? What could that be? Even when he didn't want to admit it to Andrews, he did grew a bit curious.

A growl escaped his mouth as the other man mentioned the accident. "Thanks for reminding me, that was just what I needed." He sneered to the other with a great amount of sarcasm. Deciding to stand up, he looked again at the taller male and shook his head. "Please don't. You did this to me and I know you never regretted it. Don't pretend you feel sorry for me in any way." He said with a bitter look in his eyes. For he stopped feeling sorry for himself after a few days again. He felt more hate and disappointment towards himself. And the last thing he wanted was to be pitied by the man who cursed him. The fact that he went berserk last full moon was probably caused by the fact that there was a slightest mistake in his potion and the anger of the wolf came trough. The wolf hated Ben just as much ad Ben hated the wolf. It was laughing at him now, he could hear it in the corner of his mind. This was the first time he won't use the potion at all and already had he noticed that things were different. 

The next thing what happened took him a while to think about it. While his conscience almost wanted to scream 'I don't want your help, dog.' he knew that he needed help now that his own ways didn't work anymore. Shaking his head to himself, he sat down in the brown leather chair in the back of the small lab. From a cupboard he took a glass and filled it with red wine but didn't drink it yet. "I'm listening." He said, letting the other know that this was neither a 'yes' or a 'no' yet. 

[Alex Dean Andrews]

Nodding, he understood that there was obviously something about what Ben was doing, even if he didn't think it was all that important, he just let it slide by. Alex didn't see the point in trying to master something like this if took this much pretending to be Buddha, but he wasn't the one doing it so he wasn't going to make fun of it right now. He wanted to talk to Ben, not rile him up. "Well, lucky me than." He didn't want to fight with Ben, but then again, he understood that Ben had some resentment towards, especially after this recent accident that was caused by Ben's wolf.

"I don't regret you being a wolf, I really doubt I ever will. That's true." Alex did wish that he could have helped Ben he was first turned, but the man wanted nothing to do with him. Alex did try to kill the older man's daughter. In Ben's shoes, he didn't think he would have let the man live if someone came after Josh or Chelsey, wolf or not. "But, I have family too, I have two kids neither of them would survive if they were up against my wolf. While I don't have a close friendship like you did with Swyvett, I have family I make sure I'm too far away to ever hurt." Alex had changed Casey without any issues, he would do the same thing with his kids when they were out of Hogwarts, but no one died. "So you can think what you'd like, but it's not something I would have wished on you."

Alex gave a small smile when Ben agreed to listen to him in the least, "I have a family, I was even able to change my mate 3 years ago without much issue. Alive, kinda making my life a pain in the ass at the moment, but alive." The small smile held humor even if it didn't The issues with Casey, they shouldn't even be issues right now, but it wasn't really relevant to what was going on. He wanted Ben to see that the wolf wasn't all bad, that he just needed time to roam around, to be free, but the wolf gets more angry and aggressive the more it held back. "You're making the wolf more angry, the more potions you take, the more you lock it away down here, will make it more aggressive when it comes out. You can't do anything to stop that aggression, but if you can make it so that it's never there to begin with." 

"This..." He moved his hand up, towards the stairs, referencing to the rest of the house, and the Death Eaters, "They aren't going to understand how hard this is. Ever. The longer you stay in hiding, the more suspicious is going to be made about you. Being a wolf, that was my fault, but it's what you are. I can help you. I.." Maybe he was giving too much away, but he was going to risk it, "I'm not going to stay here anymore, after the accident, people are looking to me being a wolf a lot more than they were before..So if you want my help, you can't look at them to help you too."

[Deleted]

Benjamin glared at Andrews’ words but inside he smirked a little. Yes Andrews should be glad that he wasn’t going to use his wand until he was in full control again. Then again if he was going to blow off some steam he’d better do it against the dog than anyone else. At first maybe deep inside he had wished that Alex came to pick a fight, so he’d have a reason to get mad. There was still a heavy underlying anger he couldn’t get rid off. And yes, Andrews had indirectly again been the source of his suffering. No he had to remain calm, he promised the young lord that he would not screw up his last chance.

As figured, he’d probably never hear what he wished to hear. Benjamin frowned at the taller man but remained silent. What was he even trying to achieve? ‘Benjamin you’re losing yourself here.’ He mentally told himself. Perhaps he did was losing himself, what had remained from the great man he once was? A grounded lap dog? The murder of his best friend and his little boy. Hated by his own family and the whole society. What was he even fighting for. Then Andrews started about his family and then went on about Davion. He drank the whine he’d poured earlier and looked again at Alex with a cold expression. “It figures.” He shrugged, acting all nonchalantly all the sudden, something completely different from the tendentious Benjamin Burke he always had been. “Listen, Bub. I don’t care anymore. There is nothing left I can do, I can’t even show off my face in public let along do my job as a teacher. Again because of what you did to me. I’m just sitting here, waiting for the young lord to have figured out what kind of use I still am to him.”

Benjamin let the younger man say his sayings but when Alex started about his mate, he already lost interest. Hell he couldn’t care less what Alex did in his free time or who he was sharing his bed with. Nor did he feel needed to be informed with their daily life. While Andrews seemed to see humor in it Benjamin simply raised an eyebrow before taking another sip of his wine. Then Alex told him he was making the wolf inside angry by taking potions. “Well, what did you expect me to do? Just stop with the potions? And then what? Lock myself up in an enchanted room with no one to attack until the wolf begins to tear itself apart?” He shook his head but he’d still rather have that than destroy more innocent lives.

The next thing Andrews’ said made him chuckle a little, it was not really a friendly one. “Truly Andrews. You can help me? These people have done more for me than you, and you know that. I can’t blame them for judging me now. Hell even I’m judging myself. I killed one of them, one in the inner circle, my best friend. Of course they don’t trust me. Still where am I supposed to go? I’m pretty sure the ministry will find out sooner or later and then they’ll come to put me down.” Maybe it was better that way, he was nothing but a miserable wreck. Ashamed of himself, unworthy to face anyone. Perhaps death was what he welcomed. 

---

A month later ... sorry 

[Alex Dean Andrews]

Frowning, Alex shook his head, looking up at the rest of what the dungeons consisted of. He didn't think he would be able to get through to Benjamin, but it was worth the shot. It was counting down the days until Casey and him invaded the place, they just needed to succeed in it. The more people on there side, the more likely it was for them to push forth in what was going to happen. Once they got ride of the pureblood part of everything, the 'committee' then they could move onto to bigger things. Half-bloods and muggle-borns mostly took over the wizarding world now, at least in numbers.

Winning them over would be easier once the pureblood pride group was out of the way. "I'm sorry your friend is dead, I offered to help you before. You pushed me away, not the other way around. I would have helped you do this, you want to place blame on me, go ahead if it makes you feel better. But if you keep doing what your doing, your only going to get more dangerous and more stupid." Alex narrowed his eyes no longer trying to play good cop with Benjamin. Trying to play nice obviously was only turning into 'the blame game'. "And hate me if you want to, but you know damn well, I didn't know who was standing between me and my prey as a wolf."

Not apologizing for his actions, because Alex truly saw Benjamin being wolf as a good thing if only he would use it as a good thing. "You're choices are what's making you dangerous. If you want to fix it let me help you, instead of sitting in a basement and hoping that the teenagers upstairs approves of how your life is being ran." It wasn't hard to see that most of the recruits were young, at least, younger than Benjamin. Even if Benjamin didn't want to let him help, Alex needed Ben's help to go against these people.

"Think about it. You're want your fighting to kill. If I had been a second faster, your daughter would be what you are. A bloody werewolf, would you want to hunt her too? Kill her because she's not pure enough?" Alex was angry that Benjamin was too wrapped his pride to even accept help from him, at the least, accept the help and use it later. Alex just needed him to help him shut down Donovan's little group buzz. Casey, Maria, and hopefully Draco soon would be ready to get this started. Alex's concern with Maria's additional person, was Draco being Donovan's brother. Would he really turn against blood to fight?

"I turned you, I see your wolf in the least as my responsibility." It was hard to demand that he was allowed to help Benjamin, but tell him why it would benefit for him. Holding him his hands in surrender, "Actually, fuck it. You don't want my help, I get it. If you aren't willing to let me, you wouldn't be worth the wasted time anyway." Alex turned to go back the way he came.

[Deleted]

Benjamin chuckled a little bit inwardly at Andrews. “Can you blame me for pushing you away? You tried to kill my daughter. You should be lucky I didn't kill you back then, why even are selfish enough to think I’d trust you after such a thing. You turning me into an inhuman creature is one thing but I’ll never forgive you for targeting my beloved daughter. What has she done to you?” Not that it mattered anymore things like that were in the past. Just like Benjamin who still was stuck in the past, who still hadn’t accepted the truth. If only he did and could realize how stubborn he was being. Yet things all had fallen down and Benjamin had given up hope that things still could go better.

The elder man continued to listen to Andrews slowly trying to find reason in his words. “I don’t take orders from any teenager other than the young lord. However since everyone here does, I see no problem. Even my identity is revealed I’m still quite high ranked. But not that it matters...” His voice turned into a whisper as if he was afraid someone was listening at the door. “We all know that this is useless. I should have left with Uncle Fawley when I had the chance. He saw it coming. There is no winning here, there is no more battle, we’ve already lost. Besides, I'm not even sure if I'm still behind all this.” Benjamin fell silent and seemed to be deep in thought as he poured himself another glass. “However it’s the only thing I have left... No matter what happens, I’m a dead man. Even when the ministry hasn’t appointed me for the murder on my friend, they’ll start asking questions. If Isa hasn’t told them already, perhaps they already know.”

Then Andrews hit a sensitive point, Bella. “I don’t know... what I would have done. Perhaps first I’d have killed you and your mate first to avenge her. What I’d have done to her, hell I don’t know. I think I’d have kept her hidden from society and brewed the potion for her monthly. But such a life is not a live a little girl wants.” Alex sounded angry but Benjamin remained calm all though the subject on his daughter touched him. “But that’s not what happened, so I wouldn’t know. I don’t have to answer your questions because it’s not reality.”

Then when Alex suddenly announced his department and such telling him he didn’t offer his help no longer, Benjamin looked away. He knew that this man, how much he hated him, was still his only way out of this. Deep down there was the urge to call back the guy but his courage failed him. He didn’t dare to admit that Andrews was the only one who could help him. He heard the foot steps of the other fade, he was leaving. Benjamin didn’t look at the younger man but only mumbled a little. “I’m sorry.” His lips barely moved and he wasn’t sure if the other could even hear him.


This was when Benjamin slowly began to realize that he was blinded by what he kept telling himself. By his pride, the way he once believed the future should look like. However he never realized if his daughter, the one he fought for, even wanted the pure world. "Please, wait."

[Alex Dean Andrews]

Alex nodded, he knew what he was in the wrong in a way, but it wasn't as if Alex had sought out to get the girl. He would have hurt her if she hadn't been there, what was she doing running around by herself in a forest anyway? On a full moon at that! "I understand Ben, I do. She didn't do anything to me, but you misunderstand me when I said I can help you to make things safer. I didn't mean that I could control the wolf." Even as he was saying this, Alex knew he wouldn't have tried to take over his wolf if he could, it was things like that that angered the wolf when things went wrong. "In..what I want to happen, in what is being planned, you won't need to worry about the Ministry. You'll need to lay low for a little while longer, but it would be forever."

Opening his mouth to respond, Alex just shook his head. It wasn't that he couldn't see where the older's man's longing was coming from, he just didn't under why Benjamin cared so much about it. Alex didn't care what the people here though of him, he was alive right? That was all that mattered in the sense anymore. He was leaving after this anyway, he wasn't coming back to this house. Well, not without his mate and Maria with him. Draco too if all goes to plan. "Think about what you just said, your highly ranked, but for what? Your not fighting, but our Lord has no idea how to run this. Remember being 20 Ben? Remember how you thought and went about things?" Alex remembered, he felt on top of the world at 20. Then Lynn got pregnant. Things really changed. "Remember how invincible you felt? Imagine what he feels like controlling the bloody Dark Mark."

Looking down to the drink, Alex smirked, "Side with me, help me after I help you, and you won't be a dead man. You won't have to worry about the ministry. Let me worry about that please?" Alex went to look at Ben's wand, making sure that the older man didn't get any ideas to look into Alex's mind. In a few months, if that, Alex planned on Casey already running it. No more Ministry, no more control over the werewolves, or any creature. Raising an eyebrow at the name, "You're ex-wife yes?" Clarifying that he knew who Benjamin was even referring too. "How would she even know it was you who did it?" Surely the older man didn't go to see her after the accident.

Keeping his eyes narrowed, "Reality is, you have no idea what your doing. But hiding here, isn't going to help you do anything for your daughter." Alex understood in a way where Benjamin was coming from, Alex would hate anyone who would have caused harm to his family. In another way, Alex didn't see how the Slytherin wouldn't use the information he was going to get later. Alex just needed him to help him take down the Death Eaters and Donovan, after that, Alex would understand if Ben wanted to walk away completely or attempt something towards him.

Sighing when he heard Ben speak again, Alex turned back, "In your shoes, I would hate me too. I'll help you relax with your wolf form, or at least, get away from people so you don't have accidents." Alex in a way did owe Benjamin, but Alex needed the older man's help, they were already going to be out numbered, so one more person, a talented magical person would help them. A lot. He was risking a lot trying to recruit Ben, "What I'm going to do, all my plans, is making everything..more balanced out there. What...I need from you, is when I need you, you'll help me out too. Can we agree on that?" Alex didn't plan on killing muggle-born or purebloods, he just planned on making it equal everywhere. With Casey, muggle-born werewolf as Minister, Alex didn't see how they would be anything but equality. Especially when Casey was with him, a pure blood who turned into a werewolf.

[Deleted]

“Forget it.” Benjamin suddenly shortly as Andrews tried to defend himself. It was exactly why he doubted if people like them were save for this world. Andrews hadn’t meant for the attack to happen, nobody could control it. The next thing Andrews said however made him raise his eyebrow. “The ministry? You?” He repeated the words and couldn’t help but chuckle a little by the thought. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude. But what kind of experience do you have with politics? And how do you, a werewolf, plan to gain any support from there.” He shook his head, perhaps Andrews was insane after all. Benjamin himself had taken auror training since his 17th year however he swapped it for the family shop because it was easier to combine with a family.

He managed to set his thoughts off and listen to what Andrews had to say. “Actually, when I was 20 I just started to pick up my family’s shop and my wife was expecting a child. But don’t compare one person to another. Some take better responsibility than others.” He said rather calmly, considering that ever since the former dark lord died they haven’t really done anything of use.

Again he raised an eyebrow at Andrews the look of the other man didn’t say much good. What was this man planning? It was why he’d come here, right? Only because Andrews and co couldn’t do it alone, they needed his help. And just when he thought that Andrews perhaps did cared, well Ben had to admit he almost let himself being fooled. “Side with you? That sound like you’re planning something?” He said nonchelantly as if it was the most common thing ever. So that was how it would go? Would he really betray the life he’d been taught by his parents, the life he’d lived forever. He wasn’t sure if he should side with Andrews, it sure was his only way out. But there still was the moral part of it. In the end the remaining Death Eaters would come for his head.

His eyes however turned cold as soon as the subject on his ex-wife turned up. Benjamin felt a pure anger boil up which almost caused him to break his glass. “Yes, Isa, my ex wife.” He answered bitterly. “Ever since, I became what I am… She’d done everything to let me know I’m no longer welcome in the human world. She knows I lived with Davion ever since she kicked me out of my own house, threatening to expose my identity to the ministry. So she would figure out as soon as she hears that there was an accident in that house.” It hurt him to see how easily she hated him, perhaps it was wrong to have loved her. In the end he probably was nothing to her than a forced marriage in the hope to maintain the purity in their families.

“The thing is Andrews… The best thing I can do to help my daughter is to stay away from her.” He said with a sad tone in his voice. Oh how much he missed her, when he still worked at Hogwarts he always made sure she was alright from a distance. He was scared of what she’d think of him. Scared of what her mother had said to her about daddy.

Ignoring the first words of Andrews, he did listen attentively when the younger man told him about his plan. So in the end Andrews did come here because he needed his power. For what Ben didn’t know but it seemed that it wasn’t his main thing to worry about. “You need to be more precise about what you want me to do before I agree on anything.”

[Alex Dean Andrews]

Not bother to hide his amusement, it was true, Alex knew very little, well, cared very little about what the world outside of his status or family did. But Casey, he was all about it. He knew these things simply because he wanted to, because it would help his job. "I don't. Not much in all honesty, my mate though, he has a lot of experience with type of thing. He's the...guy people willing give information too. And..I don't plan on getting the ministry to okay anything I'm going to do." Alex said so simply that really, the meaning could not be taken any other way. One step at a time, Donovan's pureblood insanity first, then the ministry.

Rolling his eyes, "But you weren't raised in a cage though were you? We're taking orders from a boy who's never had an issues outside of this house. I can compare the average 20 year old, to you. Expecting a child and having wife, that's well off, but do you think the same way now as you did when you were 20 years old?" Alex raised an eyebrow, he didn't think the same way, and he was with Lynn at the time. He was 21 when he found out that Lynn was pregnant with Joshua, he still felt like he was on top of everything. Taking care of his girlfriend and their son. "What have we even done since the Dark Lord's downfall?" Alex asked carefully, unsure how far he could go without offending Benjamin too much.

"In all honesty, I'll help you and you could just walk away, that's fine. Just when the day comes, I don't want to my team to be fighting yours." Alex would help Ben still, with the werewolf stuff, how to keep him away from certain people even in werewolf form. So long as he didn't have to worry about Ben being one of the people that were going to fight with Donovan when they do invade this place. "If you walk from me, I won't hold it against you, but I will hope that even in your dislike towards me, you'll at least if not help me, don't stand against me." Alex was more than aware of the magical skills that Ben had, Alex didn't have a lot to offer there. He relied mostly on his wits and his strength, Casey was the one with the magical gifts. "I have enough people on my side that I'm sure we can bring this place down, and I have an additional...surprise for our little Lord when the day comes as well." Alex said speaking of Draco, to his knowledge, Donovan still didn't know about that.

Not wanting to say that no one will be looking for Benjamin, due to the fact that it was a Death Eater who died. The ministry is still trying to build back up, they aren't going to bother with something as small as this. Alex knew that saying that though, would be careless. Davion's death had obviously wounded the older man, and Alex wasn't going to be the one to say that the death didn't matter. Looking over Benjamin, Alex carefully tried to word it for the older man, "The Ministry is still working up it's strengths, too my understanding they're too distracted with that." Alex had enough shame to look away from Ben while saying this, it was unfair, but what else could he say? "I'm sorry." Alex really was too, things that the older man was dealing with at the moment, Alex had never been through. Sure him and Lynn had their fall outs, but he had new mate. A mate who helped him everyday raise his kids. He didn't miss Lynn.

"I live with my kids, I've raised them from the second they were born. If you let me show you how, I'll help you so you can be around her safely. My kids have a place to go during that night." Alex was sure Josh understood by now why during the full moon they stayed with Jason, but Alex wasn't sure if he could tell his kids yet. He wanted to, he wanted them to understand, but he wasn't sure if it was safe yet. One day it will be. "I just need you to let me do my work, don't fight with them when I come back. You don't have to fight with me, just don't fight against me." Even though having Benjamin fight with him would be a much bigger help, he didn't want to push his luck with the older man's comfort zone. That would only give him a flat out no.